To Die For Her

To Die For Her -------------- -August 2009 -Tyson B. Troxel They say in life, you have exactly 2 great loves. or, at least that's what they say in "Sex and the city". Looking back onto my life, recently, I had to stop, and think about it. I don't know if that's a correct enough statement. 2, just seems like a small number. If, however, we're talking about "GREAT" loves, then, I guess it seems a little high. We had a guest pastor in church, this morning, who spoke about this. Basically, what I heard, was that, God, may be placing that GREAT love into our lives, BUT, if we don't go out and do the footwork, like asking a girl out, we'll never meet her. I guess my GREAT love will never be mine. I'm not a real macho kinda guy, when it comes to approaching women. I'm more secure in my own little box, doing my thing. If my GREAT love could bump into me, like fate, that would be AWESOME! Like, let's say, if I'm at my coffee shop, ordering my tea, and the cashier slips me her number, smiles, and rubs my hand. Or, if when I turn around, and my love, accidently bumps into me, and spills her coffee all over me, and then smiles, apologizes, and kisses me. Even better, I turn around, and a ray of heavenly light shines through the door, as my GREAT love walks in, the wind gently blowing her hair, and she walks right up to me, and hands me a rose, gently takes my hand, and says God sent her to me. And then, we walk out the door, and walk off into the sunset. No, none of that's gonna happen, BUT it would be pretty AWESOME!! Anyways...I thought about my 2 great loves, and had to break the ladies in my life, into 2 catagories. Pre-30, and post-30. The "Young Lust" and the "Post-Marriage". Then, i throw in the marriage. it kinda broke things up, and took me off the market for 7 years. So, thinking about it...here goes. "Young Lust' ------------ My 1st girlfriend. My 1st love. Sherri. We met at bible camp, and I pursued her past the summer. She was a farm girl. It lasted through christmas, but not past January. All in all, 6 months. Pretty good, for my 1st time out. Then there was Amanda "Hug-Alot'. We also met at Bible camp, and I pusued her, as I went off to my 1st year of college, in Mason City. Her dad HATED me!! We were together for about 3 months. I put ALOT of miles on my car, just to be with her. did I say, her dad HATED me! Lastly, came Lisa. We met in college (1st year) and through some VERY strange encounters/adventures, dated each other. i can say neither one of us were faithfull to each other, BUT setting her obsession over me aside, and my need for romance, we hooked it up, until the end of our 1st year of school. After that, we were on again/off again for the next 2 years. It was twisted, strange, and wrong in more ways than 1. Yes, there were other girls, BUT those 3 make the top of my "young lust" list. I guess at that stage of my life, I had 3 GREAT loves. Or, more accuratly, 3 GREAT lusts. The Marriage Years ------------------- Living in Las Vegas, at the age of 25, I met, and fell in love with a woman named Mary, who was 10 years my senior. My 1st taste, at love with an older woman. Call it lust, BUT after a month of dating, I asked her to marry me. We got married shortly there after. We lived for a short time, in Las Vegas, and then I moved her home, back to Iowa, where the trouble began. I guess a big city girl, just can't handle a small pond. So, after 7 long years of love, she threw me out, and split. That's all folks. Divorce central That was my 1st GREAT love. Post Marrriage Years -------------------- So, here I am, 2 1/2 years divorced, and I've had 2 BIG loves. I can't honestly say either was GREAT, or maybe I can.
So, then, came the “After-Marriage” loves, of my life. Not too hard to remember these 2 ladies. I can count them on 2 fingers. One. Two. Trucker girl, and Mickey Mouse.
Shortly after the seperation of my marriage, I met up with Missy. I took one look at her, and all of her tattoo’s, and low cut shirt, and I was in love! Then I found out she drove semi, and broke horses for fun. Hell, she even owned a few horses. SOLD!!
She took me up to a quiet little town, and tried to break me, and calm me. Like, all wild horses, a few can’t be broken. Not if they aren’t ready, anyways. So, she had to let me go. Not before I put up a fight though. I still think fondly of her, and her tattoo’s, and her big black semi.
Almost 9 months later, maybe less, I found Mickey Mouse. Ms. Julie. A sweet older lady, (o.k. not that much older than me) and I chased her all the way to the capital. We hooked it up, moved it on in together, and before the dust could settle, she tossed me back home.
Our love story didn’t end there though. About 6 months later, through the death of a man who is VERY dear to me, Julie and I came back together, only to separate less than 2 weeks later. To her credit, (and she gets it all) she had more love than I could know what to do with. I asked for the moon, and she gave me a maybe. I asked for swiss cheese, and she gave me a diet Mt. Dew.
All in all, what have I learned? Not much, really. Given the chance to love again, I’d do it in a New York second.. I am a passionate person, with a HUGE heart. Problem is, I don’t know how to properly treat love. It’s a drug to me, and I want more, more, more.
Not that being single right now, isn’t easy, or hard, it just isn’t. I watch movies like, “She’s Having A Baby”, and I cry. I want that kind of love. I want a baby. I want my happily ever after.
I read sappy romance books, and I want some sap, in my life.
I watch TV shows, like “Sex and The City”, and well…..
I know this much.
When God finally does bless me with the woman of HIS choosing, I will DIE for her! I will fight for her, I will love for her, I will live for her, and……
(This one is for my pastor, because I know he’s reading this)
I will treat her like my sister!